Hope your kids got it together to give you something wonderful today.
Archive for the 'Not Worth Categorizing' Category
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Just in case you’d completely run out of things to worry about.
Published May 7, 2008 Not Worth Categorizing 7 CommentsBecause it COULD happen. You could be sitting there without a care in the world. It could be that your kids are top models who just got free rides to Harvard. At the age of 10. You could have just hit the lottery and had just finished shopping around for your new housekeeper, chef, and Lamborgini before you decided to stop by my little corner of the blogosphere to see what’s up here today. Yep, you could be that one person who’s currently Not Worried About A Single Damn Thing.
And then you came here. And watched this video.
And now you’re worrying again. You are. I know you are. Don’t even try to tell me you’re not worrying right now.
You don’t need to thank me. It’s all part of the friendly service we provide.
Good news! RegularDad’s found a new band.
Published April 25, 2008 Not Worth Categorizing 4 Comments
The audition process was arduous and stressful, believe me. But they just called and said he’s in. They’ll be taking it on the road just as soon as Fozzie brings back the tour bus.
Sara over at the Learning Umbrella tagged me for this meme. Well, she didn’t really tag me. She’s got tag anxiety, just like the rest of us, so she said she wasn’t gonna tag anyone. But then she said that if she WERE to tag anyone, it would be various fabulous bloggers, myself included.
Here the rules of the meme: (1) Link to the person that tagged you. (2) Post the rules on your blog. (3) Share six non-important things/habits/quirks about yourself. (4) Tag six random people at the end of your post by linking to their blogs. (5) Let each random person know they have been tagged by leaving a comment on their website.
1. I got maybe four hours total of sleep last night, so I’m a bit punchy right now, which makes it hard to think of another five quirks about me. This is scaring me a bit, because normally I could rattle off at least two dozen quirks about myself in less than ten minutes.
2. I used to bite my nails when I was little. It was so bad that my fingernails were almost completely nonexistent. I stopped by using that nailpolish that tastes terrible. It really works. But now, I bite my cuticles. Till they bleed. I have to wear bandaids to stop myself sometimes. In stressful weeks, I’ll have at least 4 or 5 bandaids wrapped around my fingers. Back before I had kids, when I still worked full time as a graphic artist, one of the guys I worked with nicknamed me Less Nessman because I always had at least one bandaid on at all times. (Right now, by the way, I’m wearing two bandaids.)
3. I saw a sign in a church lobby today that said: “Elizabeth’s Goodbye Luncheon” and thought it sounded like a good title for a poem.
4. I’m almost completely hooked on the TV show, House.
5. Tonight, I overcooked the pork chops by mistake, and I didn’t get all stressed out about it at all. I just shrugged and said “sorry about that” and expected everyone to eat it anyway. And they did. Except my 4-year-old. But she ate most of her broccoli and didn’t whine the whole time, so for her, that’s good.
6. Right now, everyone’s asleep except me.
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Well, that’s six things. I’m too tired to tag people. In fact, I sat here way too long just trying to get to six, I’m that tired. So I’m gonna use my blanket “everybody but Doc” tag, and go see if I can find a House rerun before I fall into bed.
‘Night, all.
Came across some sort of personality test this morning, and decided to give it a go. It told me this:
Your Personality is Very Rare (INTP) |
 Your personality type is goofy, imaginative, relaxed, and brilliant.Only about 4% of all people have your personality, including 2% of all women and 6% of all menYou are Introverted, Intuitive, Thinking, and Perceiving. |
Basically, I’m goofy, but brilliant. That’s me to a T.
I like the way they say that my personality type is Very Rare. Makes me feel that much more special. And unique. And more inclined to post a link to their personality test. Go ahead. Test yourself. How much you wanna bet that we all end up with Very Rare Personality Types? My guess is: a lot of us.
After all, who wants to hear: Your Personality Type Is Pretty Much Plain Old Run-Of-The-Mill. You boring bastard. Not many of us.
Am I right, or am I right?
Well, it’s my birthday today.
It’s shaping up to be a fabulous one, too. It’s not even 9:00 am here, and I’ve already received various illustrated homemade and store-bought greeting cards, a new copy of When Harry Met Sally on DVD which is one of our All Time Favorite Movies, and a $150 gift card to our local Borders/Seattle Coffee, where I like to go at least once a week to get some alone time. I like to browse through the shelves, find some new books, and then read in the coffee shop with a decaf vanilla latte. I’ve been slowly blowing through our retirement funds doing this over the past year, but now I’ll be able to spend a few guilt-free hours buying books with my fabulous gift card. RegularDad truly rocks.
I’ve also received a Very Special Ballet Performance from my 4-year-old. She had planned to dance to one of the Nutcracker pieces, but we couldn’t find the CD anywhere, so we used our new soundtrack to Shrek the Third, and she danced to Smash Mouth’s All Star instead. Truly inspiring, let me tell you.
Then I talked to RegularDad on my cell phone while I ate my breakfast. RegularDad had to get over to the new house early this morning for an appliance delivery. He called over here to ask me to bring the vacuum cleaner and then started pretending that the call kept dropping out, like those funny commercials. Such as:
RegularDad: Okay, look, the real reason I’m calling is that we need to talk about something and it just can’t wait until you get here. It’s too important. The thing is—
…..
— and that’s how I really feel about it.
He did a few variations on this, which got me laughing pretty hard. So I’ve already had one really great belly laugh on my birthday. And all this before snack time. 
Finally, the upcoming piece-de-resistance later this morning is the delivery of a BRAND SPANKIN’ NEW STAINLESS STEEL DISHWASHER over at the new house. I’ll post some pictures later, and you can well imagine that I’ll be wiping away tears of joy and relief as I snap those shots. Then I’ll come back here and post them and then I’ll put on the old rubber gloves and wash some dishes by hand, knowing it’s the last week I’ll be doing that for (hopefully) years to come.
So far, 39 rocks!
What’s a girl gotta do to get a PG-13 rating?
Published November 9, 2007 Not Worth Categorizing 4 CommentsI ran my blog through the rating system again after I posted yesterday’s rant, and it STILL came out PG! See?
I also used the words shit and fucking in yesterday’s post, but apparently that’s okay. Just don’t talk about crap or pain or hell. Because those are MAJOR taboo subjects, right?
This rating system doesn’t seem all that accurate. Of course, it is all about online dating in Phoenix, right? It’s probably some lonely idiot sitting all by himself in a cheap apartment in Phoenix writing useless Javascript because he’s got nothing better to do. He certainly doesn’t have a date, that’s for sure.
And now we know why. His javascript sucks.
What would Jesus blog?
Published November 8, 2007 Homeschooling , Not Worth Categorizing 15 CommentsFor the record:
Personally, I’m amazed (and more than a little insulted) that I’d didn’t get at least a PG-13 out of the deal. I mean, the reason I started this blog in the first place was that I needed a place in this world where I could come and scream four-letter words. And you all surely remember that I’ve been known to do that from time to time. Right? So what’s this PG-shit crap pretense?
So, the Bizarre Born-Again Bullshit Homeschool Blog Awards are gearing up for another bout of blatant misrepresentation. They like to say they’re showing you the best of the homeschool blogs, but really what they’re showing you is maybe one-third of the blogs out there that are written by people they know from their bible studies that think only exactly the way they do in their nice little sheltered world where they like to pretend that radical liberals, feminists, gays, and such just don’t exist (and if they do exist, they’re only pestering us because the devil told them to, so keep your eyes on your bible, friends, and just don’t read anything they have to say because it might do something evil like encourage you to go trick or treating, or go see an “R” rated movie or worst of all, develop the ability to think for yourself….GASP!!!!!)
So, they prefer to disqualify any blogs actually worth reading, and one of the ways they’ve done that this year is to admit only G-Rated Blogs to the Awards program. So, if some fool nominates you and they run you through this rating service and you don’t come out G-Rated, you’re automatically disqualified.
But what I find funniest about this is that everyone is now running their blogs through the rating service and then posting the image on their blogs, like I’ve done above, and if they don’t know how to modify the code of the image they’re putting up on their blogs, what they’re actually doing is providing subtle advertising for an ONLINE DATING SERVICE somewhere in Phoenix. Go ahead and hover over that image at the top of this post and you’ll see what I mean.
Now, I ask you: is that really a Christian thing to do? To promote online dating? Is that what they want for their kids? Really? Because the vast majority of these idiots running that thing are married aren’t they? So why are they inadvertently promoting online dating?
Fucking morons, every one of them.
Personally, I consider it a victory to NOT be nominated for the Homeschool Blog Awards. In fact, if I were to be nominated for that award program (or even worse–if I actually won one), I’d have to spend the rest of my blogging life with my head hung down in shame.
And so would you.
Walk away, people. Just WALK AWAY.
