You know how sometimes you walk into a store or a waiting room somewhere and you see one of those signs that says: Children left unattended will be given an espresso and a free puppy? Yeah, those annoying things. You’ve seen ‘em, right?
Well, what I want to do is print up a bunch of little note cards that I can hand to receptionists and nurse practitioners and the like when I arrive on time for a previously scheduled appointment. A card that would say:
Hello. My scheduled appointment was at [insert time here]. I am sitting over in the waiting room with my [insert appropriate number here] darling children. You can’t hear us because I am diligently keeping my children quiet and orderly. Please keep in mind that just because you can’t hear us doesn’t mean we don’t exist and don’t have anything else to do today but sit here leafing through your old issues of People and Time. Please also be aware that if the wait for my appointment extends beyond 15 minutes, I will pull out an entire bag of M&M’s, a 6-pack of Mountain Dew, a toy percussion set, and a whole bunch of sharpie markers but no paper. And I will give these items to my children to play with until you see fit to call my name.
Have a nice day. We’re ready when you are.
I figured I’d print up a batch and sell them on eBay. What do you think? Anyone want one?
I want one or ten!!
I’ve got a doctor’s appt early next week. Do you FedEx?
It would have to be able to personalize, as in “My ___ darling child(ren)” (I have three, someone might have just one) I would totally go for it. Waiting rooms piss me off. And plus, other people’s kids piss me off. And also, the longer I wait, the longer my very well behaved children are exposed to germs from snotting, sneezing, running-around-spreading-their-germs-like-toddler-terrorist kids.
I think it sounds like a great idea.
You might add a line about how much your time costs per hour.
hee hee.
Bring them on! I might need a gross
I’m so tired of the dirty looks at small shops when I bring my three with me. By the time we leave, we tend to get compliments on their behavior but that first dirty look, while understood, is just so darn irritating.
Heather, I modified it to reflect the differing number of children possible in this situation.
I don’t FedEx, but I can provide free downloads. Because I love you all, and I think it’s high time we took these situations in hand.
How funny and true. I like the sharpie marker part. My kids could do some serious damage with markers. They are marker pros. You can see this in their eyes. I think it would be the thing that would get me into the office asap.
Let me know when you have these for sale.
Great idea!
I’d like to order a dozen.
I am in line (public school did teach me to stand quietly in line) for my share of the post-cards….. They are GREAT!
I would like to order EVERY SINGLE ONE YOU HAVE!
Doctor time is similar to dog time . . . I haven’t figured it out, but it just doesn’t translate to any known working clock or watch that I have ever seen.
Yes, please Fed-Ex me all you have. I’m a professional doctor goer-toer and I need those signs ASAP.
Oh, and please print mine with this P.S.
“Stop threatening to cancel my appointment if I am 5 minutes late, we all know that the doctor is not nearly ready anyway!”
They are funny, but since I’ve worked in a doctor’s office, I’d feel too bad to use them. I, as the receptionist, had no control whatsoever over keeping the doctor on time. And frequently it was a patient being late that would start a chain reaction of lateness …
And, I spent a few too many hours of my working time taking care of people’s kids that they had brought in with them to their appointments and then blithly thought I, as a receptionist, was also a babysitter … Pacing around the waiting room with someone else’s screaming baby while they got their back adjusted … Bad memories!
But I totally agree with you about those “unattended children will be given …” signs. Very annoying.
Count me in!! I know I’m getting my order in late, but I’m all for this! I only have one, but it ain’t easy no matter what. Besides, I have a friend with five. I’ll order on her behalf.
Sheesh, I needed one of these Friday at the orthodontist when the appointment lasted an EXTRA HOUR. And the woman who came out to tell me what was up was sort of puzzled that I was getting antsy because WE HAD SOMEWHERE ELSE WE NEEDED TO BE (like, who’d've thought we weren’t planning to spend the freakin’ day there?).
I don’t have proof about doctors, but I know for a slam fact that dentists over book, on purpose, to keep the money cranking. I suspect doctors cram their schedules too. In fact, given the nature of doctoring and dentisting - that emergencies are part of daily life there - we would like think they would schedule LESS patients in their day instead of more. Hummmmm, like we do as parents, knowing full well that it takes longer to move around with small children (for often unforeseen reasons,) we plan extra time.
Good God, do Mothers HAVE TO RUN EVERYTHING? Couldn’t they fit “Responsible Scheduling 101″ in next to Biology 101 and Chem labs.
Can I have some of those cards?
oh sweet victory that is perfect!! I would love to share those with all the mom’s I know.
Get some card stock print them out and make your self a nickel or two.
btw. thanks for stopping by the other day~
Christina
oh Katherine..
My sister works for a pediatrician..
here’s a scoop that just grinds my gears…
they book three patients for every 15 minutes.
if your lucky.. you get two minutes with the dr. He has to walk from room to room mind you.
if your a cash pt.. 75 bucks for the appt.
makes you a little sick doesnt it?